Off-line and off-shore

The Australian Public Service has annual, and long-service leave provisions for its staff.
I am therefore Summering in Switzerland.
I will be back at work (and posting) in February 2005.

I hope my country can cope without me...

TEAM SAG's newest new image

Just before we all go on leave for Christmas, Head Coach announced that we are changing the way we do things.
Hence audits, team-building exercises and workplace conferencing recommendations are all off.

"We will continue to use our corporate identity of TEAM SAG, but it will be enhanced with our new furniture, our new corporate colors and clear, clean, authored lines which will make us relevant again as we meet the challenges of the ever changing, ever dynamic workforce we inhabit with our professionalism, loyalty and commitment."

-Head Coach

Now where did I put my resume?

Upper echelons of Government continue to slim down TEAM SAG for the garage sale which will happen some time after 01 July 2005. I'm predicting by this time next year or perhaps Jan 06, TEAM SAG is notoriously slack with deadlines.

The new Butcher (we will call the Senate) will have chainsaws and boning knives glistening and whirring and the slaughter won't end until the next federal election.

The 'new' positions will be finalised soon, but I believe there will be more carving into the company's layer of middle management fat, an exercise designed to please the market and make us more palatable.

Wacky ideas leader Head Coach, is more than happy to continue with the meat cleaver in one hand and the "people matter" rhetoric in the other...

Alternate career #4

The really pretty boys at TEAM SAG could become drag queens.

TEAM SAG is eating itself

Met up with an experienced public servant today who told me that if my organisation does not stop the major changes it is making, it will self destruct.

It is widely believed that what we produce, our output if you will, has absolutely no value.
The exact quote was

"If TEAM SAG fell over tomorrow no one would notice and even less people would care"

Christmas; eat until you explode...

We all survived our Christmas lunch.
Poor old Coach and Biscuit Bob ate until they exploded and both are as big as Hereford cattle.

Alternate career #3

Perhaps the more worldly, well-spoken and intelligent at TEAM SAG could earn a living as Professional Speakers...then again perhaps not!

Alternate career #2

Those at TEAM SAG who have the bits could find employ as calendar girls.

Just because I didn't see the Veterinarian, doesn't mean that my hoofs aren't worn out.

Workplace studies of sick leave shows that Australian Workers are by and large honest. The least honest seem to be the bovines from Singapore.

This is a lesson in truth for Head Coach, LLL, heychrr kitty and Coach.

Alternate career #1

I have been thinking of possible employment opportunities for former middle management of TEAM SAG. How could their skills translate into the wider workforce I wondered?

As I was browsing the job section I spotted this advertisement and immediately thought of LLL.

De-establishing the establishment

Head Coach at TEAM SAG has de-established some 10 upper management positions.

We low-level ruminators can only watch in amazement seeing these crusty old fucks (like LLL) come to terms with their own demise. Of course there will be a handover/takeover time built in so Head Coach isn't expecting to see the new low-fat beef in Canberra before February 2005. These 10 have to vie for 5 positions if they stay on with TEAM SAG. Those of us who have observed organizational renewal ad-nausium have mid next year as a more realistic time frame.

I am postulating that TEAM SAG will be ready to be privatised by the time the 'new" Senate is in place. There will be no pesky left, left-middle, middle wing Senators to get in the way of privatising everything!

Who could be feeling moocho generous...?

Ha ha ha.
In this years arcane and tedious Christmas tradition that we know as Cris Cringle, I was allocated the Coach.
We were advised that we should spend around $10.00, but if we really wanted we could spend more.
I have bought
This,

This,



and this.

A call centre in Mumbai...

Whispers abound that TEAM SAG will become a call centre.
Privatised, streamlined, outsourced and exported...all this for a herd of cattle?